I am a huge fan of Oprah Winfrey and Tony Robbins. So, when the two of them decided to combine forces for a 2-hour Lifeclass special last week, it was a no-brainer to watch and absorb their wisdom. There are hundreds of lessons they have taught me over the years, but here are a few that I took away from their recent collaboration.
1) Everybody has a fear that “we are not enough.” For example, we feel we’re not smart enough, attractive enough, old or young enough, rich enough, happy enough, etc. Therefore, we fear that if “we are not enough,” we won’t be loved. Our response is one of two things: 1) We create an empowering story that allows us to overcome our fears no matter what the situation or 2) We come up with a story about why our life is a certain way and that it’s not our fault. The latter is the story that REALLY destroys us. Why? Because we tell ourselves the same story over and over again until we start to believe it. Not only does it ruin our lives, but it also affects everyone around us (friends, family, co-workers, etc).
2) What’s the solution? Stop telling your story! Or as Tony says: “Divorce your story!” Challenge yourself to see the truth and to own a NEW story. He suggests 3 basic ways to help do this: 1) STRATEGY. You need to know “How do I get this done?” Tony always says “Success leaves clues.” In other words, if your goal is to lose weight, find someone who has been successful at it and mimic them. 2) STORY. You need the right story. You need to create a compelling reason to change and this will help change your belief system. 3) STATE. You need to put yourself in a quality state to help create a strong strategy and a better story. State refers to both a mental AND physical one. The fastest way to change your state is “a radical change in the way you move because the emotion is what creates motion.” In other words, taking massive action is a solution to most problems, but you will only do it if you are in a stronger state.
3) Tony and Oprah both had challenging upbringings. They could have made excuses, told themselves disempowering stories, and taken the easy way out. Instead, they are REAL-LIFE examples of people who overcame their fears, convinced themselves they could achieve their goals, and took MASSIVE ACTION to pursue their dreams. Most importantly, they both enjoy fulfilled lives because they experience a deep sense of meaning and purpose consistently in their lives. They truly live by the phrase: “The secret to living is giving.”
4) Tony Robbins is NOT a motivational speaker. He’s interested in knowing WHY people do what they do, getting them to change their patterns, inspiring them to have a breakthrough, and then encouraging them to make a LASTING change. Sounds easy, right? I guess that’s why some of the top athletes, business people, and world leaders seek his advice and coaching. In addition, many people believe that Tony teaches “positive thinking” but it’s simply NOT true. He will actually tell you that NOT getting what you want can sometimes be part of your larger plan in life. “Life isn’t about getting what you want, life is about becoming more. What you get is not going to make you happy because success without fulfillment is failure.”
5) You become who you spend time with. Surrounding yourself with people who are better than you will get you to “step up your game” in business, relationships, health, and your overall life. The fastest way to get out of your comfort zone is to get around people that aren’t so comfortable. In other words, it’s harder to make a change when you’re around people who keep reaffirming you and simply tell you what you want to hear. When you surround yourself with people who will challenge you and tell you the truth, it may be uncomfortable at first, but it’s the best way to make a change.
I have learned so many things from Oprah and Tony over the years, but these are just a few of the topics from their recent class. I encourage you to watch the entire video posted below. Enjoy!
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